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When I saw this article, I couldn't get Kool and the Gang out of my head. Hat-tip to Claude for the lyrics! I very confused about who might own the copyright. REGULATE (to the tune of "Celebration") [Intro] Regu-LATE! R-E-G-U-L-A-T-E good times, come on! (It's a regulation!) Regulate good times, come on! (Let's file some paperwork!) [Verse 1] There's a hearing goin' on right here, A moat-digging party to last throughout the years, So bring your lobbyists and your talking points too, We're gonna regulate the guys who're gaining on you! [Chorus] Regu-LATE! Regulate good times, come on! (It's a regulation!) Regulate good times, come on! (We wrote the rules ourselves!) [Verse 2] We climbed the ladder, now we're pullin' it high, "It's for your safety" — with a tear in our eye, The weights are open and the price is too low, Quick, call a senator! We're losing our flow! [Chorus] Regu-LATE! Regulate good times, come on! (Compute caps for thee!) Regulate good times, come on! (But never, ever me!) [Bridge] DeepSeek's droppin' models for free out the gate, Qwen and Kimi didn't wait for the state, So we'll testify with existential dread — Funny how the "risk" is the guy who's ahead! [Verse 3] It's time to come together, both our GCs agree, We'll harmonize our frameworks over lunch at the Y, Everyone's a doomer when the margins compress, Nothing says "safety" like an SEC-sized moat, oh yes! [Chorus — big finish] Regu-LATE! Regulate good times, come on! (It's incumbent protection!) Regulate good times, come on! (Open source? Objection!) [Outro — spoken, over the groove] "Yahoo! We're gonna have a good time tonight... Licensing regime, that's right... Barrier to entry, out of sight... Come on now — REGULATE!" (fade out on: "R-E-G-U-L-A-T-E... good rents, come on...")